Lately something has been bothering me.. Something that I've asked myself over and over again.. The meaning of friends.. Well, I've seen it happened to many people, friends slowly moving away, getting in their own groups leaving some people aside, I feel pity for them and at times sorry.. For nobody in this world should be left in the cold harsh world alone out there, not even hardcore criminals, hey, at least they got their own inmates so can consider la.. However it never came across my mine that one day such a thing could befall on myself..
I've begin noticing this ever since the beginning of upper 6.. Slowly but surely u can feel people kinda moving away from u.. It's not that obvious, not that hard to notice.. I'm always a silent observer, observing the surroundings and making inferences about them.. Sometimes I feel it could be, I possibly do not fit in that same circle of friends.. Difference in thinking? Believes? Nobody knows the real reason behind it.. However sometimes certain activities I'm never been informed let upon call upon for.. OK, I'm still a 'protected species'.. My parents don't give me that much freedom even thou it's after my STPM.. Fine, I can live with that and I think that's the reason that I'm being pushed aside by the group.. I used to organised some things like yam cha and all but at times it's responded with coldness and when they have their own things, well, usually I get to know it last minute or other people.. This has not only happened once, but on several occasions already..
I've confided this to a friend of mine and he also faces somewhat a similar problem.. The reason why him and I can click together is because I think we're in the similar problem.. He has learned to deal with such problems, I on the other hand am new to it.. That is why I think he understands what I'm going through.. And he is not surprised that I've at times received such treatment.. I don't mind being alone, being alone sometimes give me the needed time to reflect what has happened in my life.. However too much of loneliness and it can become a silent killer..
Now I'm not referring this to all my friends out there, it's just a certain group that I've feel I've known them long enough and yet sometimes be disappointed by it.. I'm glad they are still my friends, I doubt they even know about this pondering questions I have in my mind.. All I have is look forward to enter uni and start afresh again.. Friends we will be, to more of that extend I doubt it very very much..
I've begin noticing this ever since the beginning of upper 6.. Slowly but surely u can feel people kinda moving away from u.. It's not that obvious, not that hard to notice.. I'm always a silent observer, observing the surroundings and making inferences about them.. Sometimes I feel it could be, I possibly do not fit in that same circle of friends.. Difference in thinking? Believes? Nobody knows the real reason behind it.. However sometimes certain activities I'm never been informed let upon call upon for.. OK, I'm still a 'protected species'.. My parents don't give me that much freedom even thou it's after my STPM.. Fine, I can live with that and I think that's the reason that I'm being pushed aside by the group.. I used to organised some things like yam cha and all but at times it's responded with coldness and when they have their own things, well, usually I get to know it last minute or other people.. This has not only happened once, but on several occasions already..
I've confided this to a friend of mine and he also faces somewhat a similar problem.. The reason why him and I can click together is because I think we're in the similar problem.. He has learned to deal with such problems, I on the other hand am new to it.. That is why I think he understands what I'm going through.. And he is not surprised that I've at times received such treatment.. I don't mind being alone, being alone sometimes give me the needed time to reflect what has happened in my life.. However too much of loneliness and it can become a silent killer..
Now I'm not referring this to all my friends out there, it's just a certain group that I've feel I've known them long enough and yet sometimes be disappointed by it.. I'm glad they are still my friends, I doubt they even know about this pondering questions I have in my mind.. All I have is look forward to enter uni and start afresh again.. Friends we will be, to more of that extend I doubt it very very much..
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